1. You sit next to a cute boy on the airplane.
2. He asks for your number.
3. Your parents meet you at the airport with open arms and generous hugs.
4. They tell you they are taking you to Sea World tomorrow.
5. You giggle like you are five years old, and promply revert to such age, letting them shower you with desired parent-child attention.
6. Cable. (This “Big Love” show is seriously scandalous!)
7. BBQ
8. Boxed wine, iced with a dash of Sprite to make a “Karel Spritzer.” Oh, the sweet, dizzying wrongness of it all.
9. Pretty flowers, fresh air and friendly faces. If you are going to visit San Antonio this year, now’s the time. I’ve been here late summer (hot, sticky, ew) and in the winter (brown, chilly, ew). Texans are a strange bunch, but they are friendly. I’d forgotten how nice everyone is.
10. Dharms, the family dog, chasing her tail for 10 minutes in glee when she sees you. Man, I love that pooch.

So come on down, y’all! I’ll save you a spot on the couch and a plate of chicken grilled to perfection. Ooh, got to go. Bill Paxton’s smootching on the next wife…