Going cave people

D and I are going paleo. This is the first week, and I would lick this computer screen if I thought it would give me the tiniest hit of sugar. Or a bump of booze. Or just a tiny crunch of foods I’ve never even craved before — like salt and vinegar potato chips.

So, yeah. It’s going swimmingly. We are both sleeping and feeling better already, but boy, am I in a mood. And oh! Is there anything more self-indulgent and douchey than writing about what you aren’t letting yourself eat, while perched in the land of plenty? No. No, my dear, there is not. As such, how about a few tips and recipes for those also going the way of the cave folk:

Paleo breakfast

The first week is expensive. You’ve got a lot of weird purchases to manage that will only be occasional, like coconut oil, aminos, etc. Suck it up and buy the best quality you can muster. It will make the first bit a lot easier if your food tastes great. And it should. There is no reason why great meat and vegetables shouldn’t make your mouth water.

If you are looking for a creative paleo cookbook, I’m a fan of this one. We are eating a lot of meals from Melissa’s book during the next two weeks. Also, get a large cup that you like to drink out of and take it with you everywhere. It may be a Nalgene, or a glass goblet if that suits your fancy. The point is: it is a lot easier to get through sugar cravings and faux happy hour when you have had plenty of water. The headaches will suck less. Naps are a plus too, if you can sneak them in.

Paleo breakfast


First paleo recipe I’m willing to share: Cupcake Eggs. ¬†Either use coconut oil or spray to cover the cups before inserting several pieces of nitrate-free sliced deli meat, forming a cup. I used 8 eggs, whipped, and distributed them over the cups evenly. Then I added a hefty spoonful of salsa to each and topped them with scallions and a dash of pepper. In the oven at 350 for 20 minutes. They are delicious, and hit the spot after a hard run first thing in the morning — you don’t even miss the cheese. Or the delicious tortilla in which this could be wrapped. Or the refried beans.

Good grief.

Next week will be easier. Off to find more water and that nap.